Caz, what else is a Sunday for but Roast Beef and all the trimmings. It was on my mind even before you suggested it, and washed it down with the usual hot chocolate and lashings of cream. I could get used to this.

Hey Dogie,

Really good to hear you are managing to have some food now... Hopefully your beginning to put a few Pounds back on?

Keep up the good work my friend and good luck for the next round of Chemo on Tuesday. 

Hi all. A correction to Gav's post, the next chemo is on Thursday, but what's a couple of days between friends

It's been a goodish day in most aspects, and I am most encouraged by the amount of food I am able to consume. Not before time mind, as the solution hopefully was found just in time for the new chemo cycle sessions. If the eating problem had not been addressed, I think I would be in lots of trouble now.

Although not so cloudy at Blackheath tonight, only very high cloud around, it was enough to stop any possible meteor viewings, although I dare say had anything larger been around, it would have been plainly visible. I have seen the larger variety light up the night sky in the past. I think we will still be in the path of this stream tomorrow, so will try again.

That's enough for today, hopefully some more good news to come tomorrow. Nite nite.

Morning Dougie.  I think you've got it right.  Eating is so important to your fight.  It's exactly the ammo you need and I'm impressed that you pulled it back the way you did.  Not only are you eating but you're also enjoying your food.  

Have a good day! X 

So glad to hear you're feeling a little better at the moment Dougie- long may that continue.

Glad to hear you're enjoying your food again Dougie, and that the improvements have been maintained. 

Have a good week matey, and take care! Hope the rib is feeling better.

Thanks guy's, if it was not for the rib, I would be feeling as good now as I have in months, but no sign of improvement as yet.

Everything else is maintaining a good balance, so happy with that.

 The shepherd's pie with melon to follow sounds nice Dotty, maybe one for me for another day. I had a fry up tonight, and to be honest, did not enjoy it one bit. I used to love fry ups, but looks like one to avoid for now, anyway.

Its not been such a good day compared to those of late, but still a lot better than some I have had recently, so not feeling too down hearted.

More perhaps later.

Evening Dougie.  I'm really impressed with your new found appetite although maybe a fry up is a bit too fatty for your delicate tastebuds just now.  Or maybe it's just that you're having a 'not so good day'.  Which I'm sorry to hear.  But on the bright side, you're having more good than bad days of late, which is encouraging.  

Dotty, it sounds like you're doing good too. Keep it up!  

I've had a long shift at work but it's been a good day as I've accepted a good offer on my mum's house and I only put it up for sale last week.  I wish it were that easy with my son's house.  It's 18 months since he died and I haven't even been able to get probate yet.  Some you win etc.  

So, have a restful night Dougie and let tomorrow be a good day!  X 

Morning Carol, glad you had a good, if hard day. House selling is always an anxious time, so I am pleased you have had some success.

On reflection a fry up was not a good plan, it taxed my eating ability to the limit, but hey, you have to try these things. The downside to the chemo is now kicking in, and I don't feel particularly good to be honest. Perhaps my body is not as strong as I thought it might be, and I am wondering how the top up on Thursday will effect. I am still trying to eat as much as possible, but don't quite have the appetite any more, so will have to be careful in my choice of menu.

I did manage to get my GP to release the prescription for the supplement drinks which will help, but why they make it so difficult is beyond me.

Had another trip out for meteor watch, but again no luck, and I have really been a dirty stop out, as I only arrived home about 30 mins ago. That would get the neighbours talking if they knew, but I was really quiet, so hoping I got away with it.

Sleeping in bed has become a problem again with the rib pain, but as my legs are really uncomfortable from the swelling caused, I really must try to get into bed later, maybe I will be ok.

More tomorrow.

Morning Dougie.  Hope you managed to get comfortable and rest after your night on the town.  

I think your reaction to the chemo hasn't been as bad as it might have been and you're doing great.  Thursday is another day, so cross that bridge when you get to it and take each day as it comes.  It's good that you're trying different meals but don't be put off if some don't go down as well as expected.  At least they're staying down now, which is a giant leap from a couple of weeks ago.

Keep up with the supplements too.  Yes it beats me why they're so difficult to get.  You'd think they'd be easier to come by than medication but I know that's not the case.  Remember to keep your feet up whenever you can, to help with the water retention as well.  Oh, I'm lecturing again and I'm sure you know all these things!  

There was no chance of seeing the perseids here last night as it clouded over in the early evening and it's still cloudy, although it is clearing a bit now.  At least you got a run out and no doubt played loud music.  

Have a better day and I'll catch you later! X

Evening all, just a quick update.

Managed to drain some of the fluid from my legs, so feeling a bit more comfortable now.

I had a really, really short hair cut today, in an effort to make the on coming baldness a little less obvious, not that it worries me particularly.

Toiletries all good again, so no problems there thankfully. I managed to eat a large dinner, despite not really being hungry, and I will be interested to see if there is any weight gain on Thursday when next I attend hospital.

I have developed a bit of a cough, just to go along with the hiccups, which aggravates the rib nicely, this is now becoming a real problem. I expect it will take a while to clear up unfortunately.

I am feeling very tired, but I intend to go out later for some driving/music, two of the real passions I have left, it's about the only time I can relax and forget about the rigours of life for a while, and I really look forward to these little ventures out.

Maybe some more later, we'll see.

Evening Dougie.  It's always good to read your reports and I do look forward to them, as I'm sure others on here do.  Even if some don't post much, they still want to know how you're doing and I always have plenty to say for all of us!   

My day has been less busy with a shorter day at work.  Being un-retired means I can choose whether or not to go and how long I spend there but the more I do, the more holidays I deserve.  I'm off to Cape Verde next week with my three sisters!  

The sky is clear here tonight so there may be some celestial activity to observe locally.  Let us know if you managed to get out to enjoy your two passions Dougie!  

Go Dougie.

Play it loud.

Queen - I'm In Love With My Car (Official Video) - YouTube

Just for Tony, played it long, played it loud.

I enjoyed my ride out, it was only for three hours, but it's so good to get out of the house, with the options it opens up. I am not feeling much like talking to people, so being mostly alone suits me fine for now. I am not normally anti-social, but it just feels easier keeping quiet right now, and just doing what I fancy. There was no evidence to be seen of the meteors, so perhaps we are well past the window for viewing, although it was largely a clear night.

Most of the recent improvement has been maintained, although I have now developed quite a bad lower back pain, maybe because of trying to protect the rib, who knows. As I have said many times, every day seems to throw up a new challenge.

Caz, you do deserve a nice holiday, especially with everything that has been going on around you, even keeping me going takes its toll, so enjoy the experience. I won't say that I am jealous, but if you could find a way to sneak me into your suitcase, I'd be eternally grateful

That's all for tonight.

Morning Dougie.  Great that you got out for a drive.  Tony's choice of music is great for banging it out on the car stereo!  It's funny how a drive in the car somehow comforts us and makes us feel free.  I feel like I've missed a day if I don't get in my car at least once, if only to drive a short distance.  

I reckon I could squeeze you in my suitcase and you'd love Cape Verde. I always deserve a holiday and I'm always away somewhere.  I think I have gipsy blood.  Cape Verde twice already in the past year, Caribbean twice and Wales at Easter, with another Caribbean to come in October.  I think that will conclude my annual jaunts until after Christmas and it's actually nice to be home sometimes.  

See how I can ramble?  

Have a good day. Try to relax those back muscles a bit.  You didn't say whether Macmillan had got back to you, but it might be worth asking them about physio, which is another service they offer. 

Time for work!  Catch you later!  X 

Good morning all, the status quo largely remains, although I did have a retching event in the early hours, which produced only a thick clear liquid. Once gone, I was ok afterwards. This has been a feature virtually since day one, with a slow build up, which has to be removed, but I am not sure why it happens.

I did not make it into bed, but slept like a baby for around 10 hours, only interupted by the event above. With my leg more elevated than usual, the drain off is proceeding slowly but surely.

All the pains from yesterday still there, but manageable, and I don't want to try and mask them at this stage of the proceedings.

I am not a sun worshipper Caz, so your holiday haul would be daunting for me, and your list for this year alone, is way more than anything I have taken in the last 30 years. Still, that's what you go to work for, so good luck to you. My idea of a holiday these days would be for peace of mind, and to get out of the house for a few hours, hence the little drive outs I am undertaking.

Finally, there has been no contact from Macmillan, so don't know what is happening there. Time for me to make a move, me thinks.

Yes I agree with Tony. You should contact Macmillan.  It's a few days since you saw them and I'm surprised they haven't been out to visit you.  Maybe there's been a lack of communication somewhere, so give them a ring and find out.  

Amazed that you wouldn't have contacted MacMillan? Surely you have????

It's been a weird day for me, and took the form of three parts.

It started well enough, as I reported earlier, with the equilibrium maintained, that is until the post arrived, where things took a huge backward step. There was a copy of the letter from my consultant to my GP, updating my situation, which hit me hard. Written in professional terms, most of which I did not understand, but included phrases like "in very poor condition", and life expectancy etc., nothing I did not already know I suppose, but to read it hit me very hard. Anyway, I had a little cry, but then started thinking in terms of they are wrong, I am going to prove these buggers wrong, I will NOT be beaten by this bloody disease.

As the day wore on and some positivity returned, I found myself reflecting on just how DO you beat the odds, this I still don't know, but the need to fight and be positive are major steps I have at my disposal. Who knows if this is enough, I don't, but the need to continue past any deadline imposed is huge, and must count for something.

Later, I had recovered enough to visit the cafe, where I had a chicken and mushroom pie, mash etc. which I really enjoyed. After another little sleep, I went out for my drive to Blackheath, and had a good natter (rare these days) and also for the first time in months had something to eat there, a toasted bacon and tomato sandwich. The stent is working fine now, I would not have been able to eat any of this food a few weeks ago.

I have been very indulgent in my thoughts and feelings in this post, and I hope you all accept it for what it's worth, I need the outlet.

The second cycle of chemotherapy happens later today, and I don't really care how hard it hits me, as long as the suffering is all worth it, by doing its job. Hopefully I will be able to update sometime early evening.

Morning Dougie. I know exactly what you mean about the reality of seeing something written in black and white. It really does hit hard. But I think you digested the information in the best possible way and came through with the determination needed to fight the odds.  The odds can be beaten and state of mind plays a big part.  I believe you can do it! 

Rant all you like and let the frustration and anger be you strength, it's not a weakness.  You will need to fight this hard but you CAN do it.  You know what to expect with the chemo, so don't let the setbacks get to you. Accept them as your allies.  Know your enemy!  Make the most of the good things in life.  Go for your meals at the cafe, drive to Blackheath for a natter and play your music long and loud! 

I'll be thinking of you today and hope to hear from you later, if you feel like posting.  X

ps - While you're at the hospital, ask what's happening with Macmillan!  You need them on side!