Sorry to read of your latest challenge. For what it's worth I'd call if you're concerned; you don't need more worry on top of everything else.

Fingers crossed whatever you decide.

Thanks Gandalf. I did not make the call, but I think I am over the worst now, so I am going to try and get some sleep.

Oh no!  So sorry Dougie.  I guess you have to be the judge and that must be difficult, but you know your own body better than anyone, so trust your instincts. It sounds like you've sailed the waves through the night yet again and got past the worst but I can imagine it's a lonely place to be.  

Now you need to sleep and give your body a rest.  Here's willing you to have a better day.   X

Hi Dougie,

Hope you are feeling a bit better today?

Have you got a contact number for the oncology department? Maybe you could give them a ring if you are still concerned?

I`m glad to read that you are on the up, sickness is abating and you`re eating solid food again. All good news, keep it up.

Have that rest in base camp for a while, then go and have things checked.

You are climbing Everest, it ain't gonna' be easy but keep going. We all believe you can do it.

Do it Dougie.

Keep going.

Hope all goes well for you.

Thanks guy's for all the comments, it's nice to know you are still with me. 

Again, details are a bit graphic, so don't read on if offended or queasy.

I don't really know where to start with this post, other than what a horrendous first 12 hours to the day it was, probably the worst I have ever experienced, from a health point of view, anyway You see this is what I am trying to say about cancer, it continually throws little surprises at you, not that this particular incident was solely down to the disease. I explained earlier about the trying to clear the constipation blockage, which I eventually completed around 05.00 this morning. I did not manage any sleep during that time, and when I did try to sleep afterwards, a new problem arose. This time with the water works. Every 5 mins or so I had a real desire to urinate, but the best I could manage were just drips. A bad burning pain accompanied these events, so I gave up and rang Guy's Oncology duty doctor. Ring for an ambulance was the message firmly put to me. This was where the problems started.

I rang, but was refused am ambulance on the grounds that my problem did not warrant an emergency service. Would I please ring 111 to explain to then, and they would get an on-call doctor to ring me back, could be up to 2 hours. In the event, it was about 90 mins, but by this point I had reached the end of my tether. With the pain forcing tears to my eyes, I was unable really to talk., but the doctor said that I should attend my local Hospital, Queen Mary's, which is not an A&E service. Got there and waited for over an hour to be seen, stomach bloating all the time, as by this time, nothing was coming out.

I am too upset to finish this post right now, will try to do so later, sorry.

Hi Dougie,

What an awful time you've had!!!

I'm pretty shocked to hear the ambulance service and 111 have gone against the instructions Guy's oncology department gave you!

Hope you are feeling a bit better now?

We're all rooting for you my friend.

Sorry to have read about that set back, but hopefully by the time I'm typing this message you may have settled down a bit by now. Like I said before, Dougie, hang on in there.

I once had an UTI and while it was very uncomfortable, that was very mild compared to what you had so you have my every sympathy.

Thanks for the comments guy's.

Since my last post I have had a little sleep, and some time to reflect on the thread. I am beginning to come to the conclusion that I am perhaps being a little self indulgent, something I don't mean to be. I am also ashamed at the weakness shown by myself in some of the posts, and maybe thinking that I am vulnerable after all. Maybe it's time for a change.

OK, without going into further graphic detail I got myself into Farnborough Hospital, It's called Princess something or other now. The upshot of all this was that within an hour, a catheter was inserted, and relief from the pain was instant. I do still get some of the burning sensation at times, but a million times better than it was. Not a too unpleasant experience in all, but well worth it. It will remain for a few days, until normal order is resumed. I eventually returned home around 17.00, and it certainly is not a day I would be keen to repeat. Constipation can do a lot of damage, and this was the result.

That's the conclusion to this story, and I do hope that I have not bored you all. My idea for the thread was to try to give some sort of perspective from a cancer fighter point of view into daily life, maybe, this is not the way to do so. I will think on, but being a cancer fighter, life is always busy, and sometimes cruel.

Glad you got the relief that was needed Dougie. With out a thread like this many people will not know what people suffer and have to go through. 

Now they have some idea of the daily things you have to go through. It will help others  who may have to go through it all or know someone who is going through the same situation. Hope you can get some rest now.

Thanks Art for the comments.

Hey Dougie, you need to quit beating up on yourself. You aren't being "self-indulgent" at all. I'm 99% certain that I wouldn't be holding up anywhere near as well as you in similar circumstances.

And I think it's great that you are giving a "true" account of what it's like to have Cancer. All the "up's and down's" that you go through and the way every day is a challenge (but usually a challenge that can be over-come) with some new experience always around the corner.

Please keep posting exactly as you are my friend. Warts and all.

I'm very pleased to hear that you found some relief from your pain in the end. Still pretty shocked that you had such a struggle to get the treatment you needed after Guy's Oncology gave you instructions for what needed to happen.

Hope tomorrow is a better day.

Thanks Gavin, be sure I will be commenting to the consultant team on Monday. The lack of attention from the ambulance controller was disgusting, and the off hand way I was treated at my local hospital was very demoralising. This is the first real bad experience I have had during the last 7 months of treatment, I hope it will be the last. I have to add that the treatment received at Farnborough was spot on though, kind, professional, and very quick. The doctor and the nurse were both young girls from Poland, my they work hard.

 Thanks Matty, I beleve you would do what you say as well.....lol. As long as I have known you, you have always kept on the straight and narrow, and I respect what you have to say. I am sure you would be the first to let me know if I was OTT, so for now, I will try to carry on as is, but it's not always easy to bare ones soul, especially on a public forum.

There will be more tales to tell, I am sure, and I will try to make it as informative and interesting as possible. I owe you a bear, or two, or three.....

Thanks Alan, your words are a comfort to me. It's a possibility that others reading this forum could have similar experiences to relate, I hope not indeed, but with Cancer seemingly to be on the increase for all of us, the threat remains. These are the folk I would like to try to inspire.

I notice that others have begun to open up about their ailments, and I would love for them to give us their thoughts, and how they handled their own particular set of circumstances, to help others in the future, not only related to cancer, but other little nasties that do occur. It does not have to be all about me, and I am sure that Carol, who opened the thread would fully endorse.

Sleep is slowly returning for me, but only in 2 or 3 hour sections, but I do feel much better when it happens.

Hey its not at all self indulgent you're holding uo well, and from the sounds of it you've been put through it.

Offloading is good for you, if it helps reduce the stress which is the last thing you need right noe as your body needs to be focused on healing

Is there anyone at home with you? 

Oh Dougie!  Matty has it spot on, so please take on board what he and others have said.  No way are you being self indulgent and you should be proud, not ashamed, that you're opening up.  How else are we to begin to understand cancer if we're not told?  And what better way to help fight it by understanding?  People need to start talking about illness and it's something we're not good at but your experience may be the start of others opening up and sharing.  Don't hold back!

I am (sat here trying to find an adequate word) sorry, saddened, devastated, (all of those and more) to read of your experience yesterday. If thoughts could cure, you'd be quite well, we'd kick that bloody cancer into touch. I know from the responses on here that others feel as inadequate as I do.  This thread is the least we can do but I wish it were more. 

Sadly, your account of yesterday has a familiar ring.  My mum went from diarrhoea to constipation and back, so it was a battle between which medication to give to get bowel movements near normal.  As for the off handed response of some of our health services, I'm afraid I can relate to that too.

It sometimes seems there's a fortress built around our medical experts and it's a full scale battle to get to them.  I think it's because they don't understand cancer.  They don't understand the frustration of getting treatment when you know what's needed but they can't see it.  They don't understand how important it is that you have immediate access to emergency treatment to relieve symptoms.  That treatment may be quick and simple but it can be vital to your continued health but they don't understand.  

I wouldn't have understood had I not gone through fighting cancer with my mum.  Only those who've experienced it understand the urgency, the frustration, the feeling of isolation, desperation, anger etc of being ignored by those who block the path to those who can help.

Dougie your thread can help others to understand and it's only through understanding cancer that things will improve.

Please have a better day today.   X

Thanks Jake, stress plays a bit part in cancer, but I try hard not to let it get to me, not always successfully I might add. Days like yesterday bring it all to the fore, when it seems the whole world is against you.

I live alone in a retirement home, which does have some emergency contact equipment dotted around the rooms, and the building. There is a house manager also who will respond but is not medically trained. She is far happier organising fish and chip dinners, or booking Elvis impersonators to entertain the other residents, than to get involved with anything regarding welfare..

Family, I have a sister who is disabled and lives miles away, so don't see much of her, partly my fault, I can't stand her husband, and that is it really, so as you see, very much left to my own devices, which is fine when you are well, not so in times of need.

The downward trend in my existance, which has clearly been going on, particularly over the last 3 months, will I think continue until after the next few cycles of chemotherapy, and then, and only then could there be an up-tick, provided the new chemo works, perhaps a 50/50 chance.

Still, I have survived 7 months of treatment to a greater or lessor extent so far, who is to say I won't be still here, this time next year, don't place your bets. 

Carol, I find it hard to write an adequate amount of praise in your direction. You have been my rock, a corner stone, to try to combat this awful disease. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for opening this thread, which has been hugely beneficial to me, and also all the words of encouragement you have given to me. No words could ever portray how much this has mean't to me. You are wonderful.

The health service,  from your experience, and mine, can be far from great at times, but those at the business end, the nurses, some of the doctors, and other ancillary workers do a fine job, so caring, so dedicated. I can't tell you how many times I have received a hug when leaving a ward, they are all modern day hero's. It's the management level where the problems exist I feel, and some of these should be brought to task.

 Those members of this forum who have responded to this thread, have also been wonderful, such kindness, such empathy, and although I don't get too involved on a daily level in the forum any more, their contributions have been non the less important to me. I thank you all.

For me, the way i am dealing with this illness, is not to say, hey, I have cancer. To me it's just another ailment, like a cold, flu etc., which has to be faced, and I think to myself, tomorrow will be a better day. I don't hold a dread, because its cancer, it's just another illness to get over. Serious though it is, the battle can be won, and that is my intention. If I fail, well, at least I and all the medical teams I am dealing with have done their best, you can't ask for more than that.

In the words of the old Buddy Holly song (who?, say the younger members) "The sun is out, the sky is blue, there's not a cloud to spoil the view" so I'm going to the cafe in a minute or two ( well at least grant me some poetic licence here), but first, I have to discover the problems of taking a shower, with all this plumbing attached to my manhood. It's all looking a bit forlorn, but I am sure it will be educating.

Have a good day, I'm going to try to do so. Thankyou, Thankyou, Thankyou.